So I was all ready for airport security...no guns...check...no liquids...check...it came time for me to go through the "metal detector".
I hate this part...i always feel like if it finds some metal I'll get zapped or something.
It reminds me of when Atreyu goes through the Southern Oracle and you wait with bated breath to see if his heart is pure enough that the Sphinxes don't open their eyes and zap him.
I think about that every time I go through airport security.
Anyway...I'm pretty sure I am completely metal less and I walk through...but i guess I walked a little funny...I think I almost ran through out of irrational fear. The security guy on the other end wasn't having it, and said....
"I need you to turn around... go back through... and this time...walk normal."
I had failed.
I went back to the beginning. At least I was being given a second chance.
But I was stumped...which one was "normal"? I can do a limp, I can walk like a gorilla, I can show you an old lady with a cane...but for the life of me i couldn't remember "normal"...the pressure was definitely on.
I gathered all the knowledge I could as to how "normal" people walk... and I went through again... this time...in slow motion...and...on tiptoe.
The security guy shook his head...but knowing I was a lost cause told me i could grab my bag and move on.