Ellipses...

schedual for seeing kelsi...

2009-07-29T18:02:00.000-07:00

A good friend of mine found this on the ground the other day...

Nate
"Schedual for seeing Kelsi"
Sunday: No limit
Monday: dont see her
Tuesday: No limit
Wens: alternate no limit/ limited to meeting only
Thurs: No limit
Fri: don't see her
Sat: alternate limited to meeting/ no limit

Poor girl...she's probably sitting at home on Monday and Friday wondering why he doesn't call....

Strangest Conversation In The World...

2009-07-08T12:21:00.000-07:00

I think of all the billions of conversations that take place all around the world every day...the strangest one is this:

"Sweetheart...I've been thinking a lot lately...annnnd...
I think we should name him "Dick"."

"Oh, Honey! That's perfect!"

The Best Man

2009-06-11T09:54:00.000-07:00

I think it's strange that we call the best man the "best man" at a wedding...don't you think that's a bit rude to the groom...shouldn't he be the "best man"... you'd think it would give the bride second thoughts too...I mean if HE is the BEST MAN, who's this guy next to me saying "I DO"!

Counterfeit...

2009-04-19T15:39:00.000-07:00

I think if I ever decided to become a counterfeiter...i would make $1 bills and quarters...that way people would be less interested in trying to arrest me and I would have a lot of quarters to do laundry...

Indoor Plants...

2009-04-03T13:58:00.000-07:00

I was at the nursery the other day and asked a salesperson if they had any indoor plants and he said..."There's no such thing as an indoor plant."...Good Point!

New Rule...

2009-03-25T12:40:00.000-07:00

I would like to implement a new rule for a very common daily problem...that is the problem of the "lost call". You're on the phone chatting away...call gets "lost"...where?...who knows...immediately both callers begin dialing only to receive a voice mail message...people who you are really in sync with IE: best firends...lovers...this could go on for days... as you both try to call each other at the exact same second. Okay...so New Rule: whoever called the other person originally should be the one to call again. And that's the rule!

Bumper Sticker...

2009-03-06T12:30:00.000-08:00

I think a good bumper sticker idea would be...

"I'm Winning"

No...

2009-03-04T09:16:00.000-08:00

One of the first rules of improvisation is to never say "no"...for instance if your stage partner says "would you like a pickle?" you are supposed to say "yes" to keep the action moving...If you were to say "no" then the action would end... there is nothing left to do except argue back and forth... not very interesting for the audience or the actors...I am also a firm believer that this rule carries over into life... saying "yes" will keep things moving and shaking in your life...obviously there are times when you cannot possibly say yes or when it would put you in danger...but as a general rule... i think yes is generally best.

Oatmeal...

2009-03-04T09:14:00.000-08:00

Even though oatmeal is reminiscent of sludge...i still think it is delicious...

Ipod...

2009-03-03T11:23:00.000-08:00

I think my Ipod has a crush on me...because everytime I turn it on...it tries to seduce me by playing all of my favorite songs back to back.

The Winner...

2009-03-03T11:22:00.001-08:00

I love it when a guy holds the door open for me...because then it gives me a head start...and then i beat him and I am the winner.

100 Underrated things to ponder...

2009-03-02T13:31:00.000-08:00

This blog is in response to James Gunn's blog "100 Most Overrated Things Of All Time"

http://blogs.myspace.com/index.cfmfuseaction=blog.view&friendId=58119776&blogId=473026634

...which although I found to mostly be true I also found slightly offensive (as he mentioned most of my favorite things which makes me feel unoriginal...and I hate feeling unoriginal)....so here they are, in my opinion...

"The 100 most UNDERRATED things as of Now (not of all time)" ...some of these things were once accurately rated, but in my opinion have, to our disadvantage, become under appreciated...

100. holding hands
99. bowls
98. Patricia Clarckson
97. wearing scary costumes on Halloween (as opposed to sexy costumes)
96. suspenders
95. the Dustbuster
94. "The Jerk" (the movie)
93. the jerk (the dance)
92. croutons
91. wednesday nights
90. using correct punctuation
89. mailmen
88. eating breakfast for dinner
87. giving homemade birthday cards
86. "Anchorman"
85. not having a tattoo
84. Popsicles
83. carpooling
82. double stick tape
81. indoor/outdoor cats
80. machiattos
79. "True Romance"
78. flossing
77. sincerity
76. pencils
75. natural beauty
74. the great feeling after getting an oil change
73. large vocabularies
72. the spare button
71. Eric Wareheim
70. "Crash Test Dummies"
69. post-its
68. carrying a flask
67. dating someone your own age
66. instant oatmeal
65. naps
64. David Krumholtz
63. the 99 cent store
62. "Flight of the Concords"
61. Giuseppe Arcimboldo
60. honey as a sweetener
59. taking the bus
58. Beverly D' Angelo
57. bees
56. Lisa Frank
55. colorful clothing
54. giving mix Cd's as gifts
53. "Marcy Playground"
52. the tambourine
51. making out
50. "House of Yes"
49. the checkout boys at Trader Joes
48. water
47. "Gremlins 2"
46. Lawrence Welk
45. balloon animals
44. the Bedazzler!
43. faking it
42. puns
41. "Mean Girls"
40. "Sparks" (the band)
39. Sparks(the beverage)
38. "Innerspace"
37. vitamin B12
36. speedos
35. bowling
34. Galileo
33. bicycling as a main form of transportation
32. shoelaces
31. narwhals
30. saffron
29. woman's' sports
28. artichokes
27. learning from the elderly
26. garbage men
25. downtown Los Angeles
24. breathing
22. beets
21. urinal cakes
20. handwritten letters
19. fire
18. "Tron"
17. covens
16. fabric softener
15. bowling
14. Brussels sprouts
13. comic books
12. "My So Called Life"
11. the wheel
10. Ringo Star
9. porcupines
8. quality toilet paper
7. going dutch
6. "Mudcrutch"
5. The Clapper
4. etiquette
3. the asterisks
2. Elvira
1. And the number one underrated thing....
The Lost City of Atlantis....definitely not enough coffee talk going on about that whole mystery!

Fact Time...

2009-02-23T16:39:00.001-08:00

Fact: There are more trips made to the emergency room from slicing bagels than any other type of accident.

If...

2009-02-20T12:26:00.000-08:00

If you think no one cares if you are alive...try missing a couple of car payments...

Things That Don't Exist...

2009-02-18T12:54:00.000-08:00

Things That Don't Exist...
1. shoes made out of butterflies
2. fish food for humans
3. nag champa flavored toothpaste
4. "Feng Shui for your aquarium" books
5. checks with Satan on them
6. riveting 3rd grade math books
7. tropical punch scented deoderant
8. chop sicks that are good at chopping
9. teeth massages
10. fake freckle injections
11. velvet toilet paper
12. a mathematical equation for love
13. funny parking tickets
14. tequilla flavoered ice cream
15. address books with the addresses already in them
16. makeup for trees

Sleep Camping...

2009-02-13T10:06:00.000-08:00

Is there such thing as "Sleep Camping"? ...you know...when you fall asleep in your bed... but at some point in the middle of the night you unconsciously pack all your camping gear in the car, drive off into the woods, pitch your tent, build a fire, tell a ghost story, pack up the car, return home and wake up in your bed with no memory of the adventure... because...number 1. That would be really cool...and number 2. That would explain the 40 some odd bug bites I woke up with this morning... I "Slept Camped" last night....maybe???

A Good Horoscope...and Even Better Advice...

2009-01-23T16:30:00.000-08:00

Every now and then you get a horoscope that really makes sense and allows you to breath easier...This one is mine for today, but I'd like you to take this excellent advice for yourself.

"Have you been spending too much time exploring new things and not spending enough time with the tried and true? There is nothing wrong with where you are now, who you are with now, and what you are doing now -- so enjoy the moment. Sometimes, focusing too much on your next steps in life only keeps you from appreciating where you are right now. Being content is not a sign of having no ambitions in life -- it just a sign that you are wise and happy. "

Urban Art...

2009-01-21T14:47:00.000-08:00

Just a little urban art for the soul...

Scuff Mark...

2009-01-21T12:10:00.000-08:00

Can you see Falcor, The Luck Dragon in this scuff mark on the bathroom door...???

See??? His tongue is sticking out and he's flying through the air...!!!

A Little Light Reading...

2009-01-08T17:12:00.001-08:00

The other evening I took a moment for a little light reading found on the inside of my matchbook...this is what it said...
"Explore a world of incredibly good taste with safeway select great escapes ice cream. A delicious and indulgent departure from the ordinary ice cream itinerary..."

...interesting thing for a match book to say...but okay...

The Cutest Dog In The World...

2009-01-08T13:58:00.000-08:00

Today on my way to work I saw... the cutest dog in the world...I'm sure I have used that term loosley in the past and if i could take it back I would... because this time... it was actually and literally.... The Cutest Dog In The World.

Yard Sale...

2009-01-05T18:55:00.000-08:00

A lovely friend of mine just taught me a new term... and low-and-behold it's on
urbandictionary.com...

Definition of "yard sale":
When a skier or snowboarder eats it on the slopes and loses all of their gear. If a skier loses his skies, poles, hat, goggles, and anything else, shout "YARD SALE" from the ski lift above him.

Love it!

"Turkey will always be the main event at my house..."

2009-01-05T14:15:00.000-08:00

I know it's probably bad blog karma to criticize one's blog in your own blog...BUT............
For an entertaining evening...i highly recommend gathering a few friends and reading from Gwenyth Paltrow's blog aloud...

Here's an excerpt and a link...
This is for real....

Thanksgiving
Thanksgiving is, without a doubt, my favorite holiday. I love when everyone comes together and celebrates the idea of gratitude, something we all mean to do every day, but seem to lose sight of most of the time. I also love the cooking – the days of planning and chopping and basting. This year, I decided to work out three variations on the traditional meal: a big group, a small gathering and a cozy dinner for two.
Turkey will always be the main event of Thanksgiving (at least in my house) and a whole turkey is the way to go if you’re feeding at least 12. But if your party is smaller, the stuffed turkey breast turns out to be a great halfway point. Brining it overnight insures that you don’t need to baste it and it has a quick cooking time. Why should things be any less festive if dinner is just for two? I came up with these stuffed turkey burgers which were a giant hit in my house. They are the perfect solution for anyone who isn’t feeding a big group (or for a big group that wants to try something different!).
Mostly, make sure that no matter what type of meal you are having, you take a moment to think about how much you do have (health, love, friendship, passion, perspective, appreciation, intellect, reason, kindness) and reflect on how you can share more of it with others.
http://www.goop.com/

Popular...

2008-12-31T16:28:00.000-08:00

Wish I would've know this guy...he must've been REALLY cool...!

Time For a Shout Out...

2008-12-19T14:49:00.000-08:00

This guy...

It's easy to take for granted this little man... who can spew scalding hot water within minutes of turning a knob on the very coldest of L.A. mornings...but I like to say a little... "thanks Mr. Water Heater..." every time i get to wake up to his glorious warmth...

Now if we could just work out the whole freezing toilet seat situation...

Another Airport Story...

2008-12-01T06:51:00.001-08:00

So I was all ready for airport security...no guns...check...no liquids...check...it came time for me to go through the "metal detector".
I hate this part...i always feel like if it finds some metal I'll get zapped or something.
It reminds me of when Atreyu goes through the Southern Oracle and you wait with bated breath to see if his heart is pure enough that the Sphinxes don't open their eyes and zap him.

I think about that every time I go through airport security.

Anyway...I'm pretty sure I am completely metal less and I walk through...but i guess I walked a little funny...I think I almost ran through out of irrational fear. The security guy on the other end wasn't having it, and said....
"I need you to turn around... go back through... and this time...walk normal."

I had failed.

I went back to the beginning. At least I was being given a second chance.
But I was stumped...which one was "normal"? I can do a limp, I can walk like a gorilla, I can show you an old lady with a cane...but for the life of me i couldn't remember "normal"...the pressure was definitely on.
I gathered all the knowledge I could as to how "normal" people walk... and I went through again... this time...in slow motion...and...on tiptoe.
The security guy shook his head...but knowing I was a lost cause told me i could grab my bag and move on.

My Favorite Quote of the Day...That I Said...

2008-12-01T06:47:00.000-08:00

Upon meeting some new people...

"Hi...it's nice to meet you.........sorry...it'll take a minute or two for me to come out of my shell...then you're really gonna miss that shell..."

Soap...

2008-11-03T15:52:00.000-08:00

It's ironic...one of the most difficult things to clean up is spilled...soap.

A Wonderful Birthday...

2008-10-28T17:11:00.000-07:00

You know what would be really funny... to throw a party on someone's birthday and invite them without alluding to the fact that it's their birthday... then when they arrive tell them it's an intervention for them and have the guests be really concerned... then when the guest of honor is real down in the dumps and ashamed have evryoine say "Just kidding...Suprise Happy Birthday!" They'll be so relieved that they don't have a problem that they will have a wonderful birthday!

Don't be Schmeil!...

2008-10-28T10:52:00.000-07:00

What if the word "late" was changed to the word "schmeil"...???

"I'm sorry I'm so schmeil, I couldn't find my keys."...
"I'm running a little bit schmeil, but will get there soon."...
"Don't be schmeil!"...
"My period is schmeil...sure hope I'm not pregnant."

I think the world would feel just a tiny bit lighter...

Traffic School...

2008-10-27T12:33:00.000-07:00

so i've been taking online traffic school lately...you know... just to brush up (and to get a red light photo ticket off my record) and i've been noticing some pretty funny stuff...
Here is an exact questions i was asked in order to move onto the course three...
True or False?...

1. When you encounter someone driving the wrong way on a one way street, you should block their path with your car in order to protect other drivers on the road.

A. True

B. False

By the way... the correct answer is False. I really hope you got that.

Here's another driving tidbit to remember...

"Use your horn to warn others of your presence or of an impending situation. DO NOT use your horn to express your emotions (i.e. anger, rage, disappointment)."

HONK HONK!! "I'm sooo Dissapointed in you!!" Hahaha.

And my personal favorite quote in course one...

"Backing up against the flow of traffic is foolishly risky."
"foolishly risky"...that's sooo cute!

I'm Confused...

2008-10-20T14:48:00.000-07:00

I'm confused. Whenever the millenium was brought up in the 1980's and 90's... there was always talk of shiny futuristic metallic clothes... Here we are almost a decade in... NO metallic clothes what so ever... I guesss we really misjudged that.

Good Advice...

2008-10-09T17:18:00.000-07:00

Not sure what to do with your life....? follow these two simple guidlines and you should be fine...

Smiling Food...

2008-10-07T16:31:00.000-07:00

What does it say about our society that we are not phased when eating something that is smiling back at us...?

I mean...look at this guy....i want to hang out with him....not eat him...

Relax.....

2008-09-25T20:32:00.000-07:00

"Relax...it's only a movie!".... is a button my grandma used to keep by her bed...it used to really freak me out...like...if it's only a movie... why do i have to do anything?

Attention Shoppers....

2008-09-17T20:07:00.000-07:00

This is the best time of the year to buy a bathing suit... they are on sale and haven't been completely weeded through yet. So go ahead... give yourself something to look forward to while we endure yet another long harsh L.A. winter...;)

"Spare a Quarter"...

2008-09-15T14:50:00.000-07:00

As if we need any more proof that costs are rising...but there's a homeless guy in my neighbor hood who has been asking for change the same way for as long as i've lived in LA... I call him "Spare a quarter" guy... he always says the same thing with the same toothless grin... "Spare a quarter?"... yesterday outside of Trader Joes... even HIS costs are going up as he said to me... "Spare a dollar?"!

Test Your Legal Knowledge...

2008-09-08T11:56:00.000-07:00

One of the pictures below shows something illegal to do in a Ralph's shopping center... and something legal to do in a Ralph's Shopping center... can you guess which is illegal....?

You are incorrect... riding around in the motorized shopping cart which is typically reserved for the elderly and disabled is LEGAL... taking photographs of your friends having a jovial time in a Ralph's shopping center is ILLEGAL...go figure...

Please...

2008-09-05T16:07:00.000-07:00

Please don't put clothing on your pets. Thank you.

No gum...?

2008-09-03T20:37:00.000-07:00

Have you ever been to Target and just bought 1 item...? betcha you haven't...In fact I recently asked my local Target checker if he has ever seen this.... he said...

"Just one item...with no gum....?"I said..."just 1 item with no gum...no magazine... no last minute impulse buy of a $7.99 Titanic DVD...1 item...you ever see this?"... He said no.

My Slightly Evil Thought For the Day...

2008-09-03T16:55:00.001-07:00

Today I had at least one slightly evil thought... As I was putting a flower pin on my lapel (in order to hide a small pasta stain)... i wished...just for a second... that is was one of those flower pins that would squirt water into peoples eyeballs...

Adorable Trash Can...!

2008-08-29T19:49:00.000-07:00

This trash can has a little pony tail... Adorable!!!

Favorite Movie "Quote"...

2008-08-28T18:14:00.001-07:00

Ok... i know it's kinda long to be a Quote Unquote "Quote"... but I love this quote...go ahead... read it in your best Brooklyn accent...

"No, there's more! You see? When the left tire mark goes up on the curb and the right tire mark stays flat and even? Well, the '64 Skylark had a solid rear axle, so when the left tire would go up on the curb, the right tire would tilt out and ride along its edge. But that didn't happen here. The tire mark stayed flat and even. This car had an independent rear suspension. Now, in the '60's, there were only two other cars made in America that had positraction, and independent rear suspension, and enough power to make these marks. One was the Corvette, which could never be confused with the Buick Skylark. The other had the same body length, height, width, weight, wheel base, and wheel track as the '64 Skylark, and that was the 1963 Pontiac Tempest. "

No Floor...!

2008-08-20T10:52:00.000-07:00

Here's an excellent and cheap alternative to a burgler alarm... nobody's gonna break into your house with this on the front door!

Sunset Junction...

2008-08-20T09:23:00.000-07:00

Sunset junction street fair...for some: a festival of music food and friends...for others: an ex boyfriend parade...

Cute Problem...

2008-08-08T14:32:00.000-07:00

You know those websites like ask.com... well i found this guys question and just loved the idea of this man sitting down at his computer with this little problem...

"one day i passed a bakery store in a mall (which i visit frequently so i passed that bakery so many times) and i noticed that they've changed the name from 'bread story' to 'bread tales'. so when i met up with some friends and i told them (rather enthusiastically) that the bakery had changed its name. and they all looked at me like 'why are you telling us that?' or 'is that important?' is it not something you usually tell people? i have problems figuring out what to say sometimes so i figured i might say something that i saw earlier that day but it seemed like people don't like it."

It's such a cute problem...

New Movie by Little Brother...

2008-08-05T13:21:00.000-07:00

This one is my favorite so far...

2 Curlers...

2008-08-04T18:35:00.000-07:00

My big sister and I are three years apart... when we were growing up she was kinda mean... i look back and think that I am a stronger person today because of how difficult she made my childhood at every possible turn....and i would thank her.
That doesn't keep me from blogging about the suffering she caused me 17 years later...
Please see a letter that i wrote to her asking a very simple favor...
(Celeste, May I please borrow 2 curlers just 2 curlers, that's right just just 2 curlers. I will give them back on 3-16-91. If they are not on your desk by 3:00 then I will owe you $5.00. Please consider it! Thanks, Nicolette P.S. you are absolutly right...just 2 curlers!)
then she said...
(That doesn't make any sense. Why would you give me $5.00 if the curlers weren't on my desk)

She then asked me to give her some reasons why she should let me borrow 2 curlers... see below...
(1. because I am your cute sister.
2. you have about 13 and i have 3.
3. because you love me
4. and because I am giving you stickers! by the way I am running out.)

No. I never received the curlers... in case you are wondering.

in the head of an insomniac...

2008-08-01T09:46:00.000-07:00

am i awake…? shoot. go to sleep.. you have to work early…ok 1…2…3… sleep. am I asleep… ? i’m hungry… string cheese sounds good… I wish string cheese would come if I call it… heeeeere string cheese string cheese string cheese… ok that’s ridiculous… go to sleep… I should take karate… did I set my alarm…? did I make sure its am and not pm? What am I gonna do tomorrow night? I have nothing to wear… I should go shopping…. I have no money… did I pay my rent? Shhhhh, go to sleep….count sheep or something… I wonder who invented counting sheep? Why sheep? Probably cuz they look like a pillow but so do bunnies and we don’t count bunnies. Mmmm string cheese…. I should do community service… man… I spend a lot of money on rent… I wonder how many homes I could have already bought…. I should buy a house…go to sleep! I wish I was really good at ping pong… Don’t forget to call mom tomorrow… maybe I should write that down…maybe I should just wake up and do something… I could read a book… I should read more…I don’t have the energy to lift the book to my eyes… how is it I’m not tired enough to sleep… but I haven’t the energy to lift a book….? Go to sleep…where’s my car…?i need to go to the dentist… ok breath, you’re stressing yourself out…what was that sound!? Probably my cat… breath..no one is going to kill you tonight…. Relax and go to sleep…. I wonder if my cats think they have a nice life? I should play with them more… I should travel….sleeeeeeep….what time is it? no. don’t look at the time cuz then you’ll stress out and never be able to sleep…it’s probably not as late as you think anyway… or what if it’s REALLY late? Shhhh…relax your toes..ok breath into your ankles... realax your legs...…? yeah. I’m definitely hungry… maybe that’s why I can’t sleep… my body is waking me up cuz it needs nourishment… the nourishment of string cheese….shhhhhhhh….. ok breath in and out in and out…..in and out… in and…..out….in….and…………….ou

IM from RC

2008-07-23T21:14:00.000-07:00

Here is an IM from my friend RC when I had computer problems and didn't recieve his messages...
P.S. if you use this IM for your song lyrics... I get half!

eightiesbangs (1:05:07 PM): YOu
eightiesbangs (1:09:31 PM): hmmm... you must hate
eightiesbangs (1:09:35 PM): ME!!!!!!
eightiesbangs (1:09:59 PM): You think I'm ugly and smell like puke
eightiesbangs (1:11:57 PM): you think I have worm eyes hawk fingers
eightiesbangs (1:14:29 PM): and you don't like gays
eightiesbangs (1:14:50 PM): you think they're crusted in AIDS rotten berry jam
eightiesbangs (1:30:02 PM): Or maybe you got in a fight last night and lost all your fingers
eightiesbangs (1:31:07 PM): Now I can say things like "Don't point your finger at me... Ohhhhh"
eightiesbangs (1:37:38 PM): Maybe someones holding up your store!!!
eightiesbangs (1:38:01 PM): If thats the case, and you're tied up, try to type HELP with your nose
eightiesbangs (1:38:26 PM): but be sure it's all in caps, or else I'll think it's a false clain
eightiesbangs (1:46:22 PM): Are you making Ramen?
eightiesbangs (1:50:54 PM): Brewing pumpkin beer?
eightiesbangs (1:53:34 PM): Writing down on paper, over and over again, Nicolette Bower?
eightiesbangs (1:53:56 PM): Skinning carrots?
eightiesbangs (1:54:23 PM): Tantric poses with the office girls?
eightiesbangs (1:55:02 PM): Dreaming about dragon worlds?
eightiesbangs (1:59:13 PM): Translating Spanish sign language for your new deaf Mexican friend?
eightiesbangs (2:08:31 PM): Talking to Jesus?
eightiesbangs (2:17:07 PM): Making your famous tuna balls?
eightiesbangs (2:18:22 PM): Luring little girls in with kittens, so you can kidnap them and raise them as boys?
eightiesbangs (2:24:12 PM): Spitting?
eightiesbangs (2:24:24 PM): Biting off more than you can chew?
eightiesbangs (2:26:29 PM): Signing a petition to enact mens names for hurricanes too?
eightiesbangs (3:06:34 PM): http://eightiesbangs.blogspot.com/
eightiesbangs (5:05:17 PM): WHY WONT YOU LOVE ME?
eightiesbangs (5:06:22 PM): The perils of evil from which you won't emerge have blackened your heart to a crumbled charcoal wisp
eightiesbangs (5:06:30 PM): and I mean that
eightiesbangs (5:11:52 PM): hump
eightiesbangs (5:11:56 PM): boo
eightiesbangs (5:12:03 PM): creepy

Favorite Place To Be....

2008-07-17T16:34:00.000-07:00

Of all the places a person can be... my favorite place is...on the list.

Macaroni and Cheese Graveyard...

2008-07-14T18:59:00.000-07:00

This is where Macaroni and Cheese comes to die...

Pothead...

2008-07-14T18:52:00.000-07:00

This is what an actual "pothead" looks like...

Lovely Horoscope...

2008-07-09T12:27:00.000-07:00

I think this is just the loveliest horoscope I have ever gotten...

"It is going to be an easy day for you, full of easy conversations and simple tasks."

just lovely...

DEElicious... :)

2008-07-08T19:35:00.000-07:00

Have you ever eaten this? cuz it's delicious... especially if you are a salt person...
I eat it all the time. Just a little snack secret...

Fourth of July....

2008-07-07T19:15:00.000-07:00

Thank you Universe for my fantastic friends and yet another glorious day of my life... you are too good to me...

Same Same...?

2008-07-04T10:14:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite things in the world doesn't have a name... it's when you hear a word and see the object itself at the same time... for instance you're in your car jammin out to Ace of Base "I Saw the Sign"... when as soon as she says the word "sign" you happen to look up and see a sign! or... you're jamming out to Dean Martin's "Thats Amore" and right when he says the word "moon" you happen to turn a corner and there it is... the moon...! it makes me feel like everything is perfect even just for an instant... but the crazy thing is... it doesn't have a name... deja vu gets a name why not this? I think it should be called "same same"... ?I don't know... do you have a better idea?...

Comforting Thought...

2008-07-03T14:21:00.001-07:00

EVERYONE has problems...

New Movies By My Little Brother...

2008-07-03T11:26:00.001-07:00

My Brother's latest creations... Enjoy!

Telephone Dial Tone...

2008-07-03T09:39:00.000-07:00

My bass guitar teacher taught me last night that every dial tone in every phone is the key of A and the key of F together.... then proceeded to teach me how to tune my bass to any telephone... I was so excited to tell my bandmates this fun and useful fact when Rc burst my bubble with .... "but you don't have a land line".....
Thanks, Rc...

Crazy Tim...

2008-07-01T13:51:00.000-07:00

The Movies are an extremely awesome local Silverlake band... The lead singer, Tim... is "kinda crazy" (that would be a direct quote from everyone that has ever met him).
Last night at the rock show he kicked off his shoes and emptied his pockets on the stage...

The keys, wallet, phone, and gum wrapper make sense... but is that a Jenga piece next to the lighter? and if so, why is Time carrying random jenga pieces in his pockets to the rock show??? crazy Tim....

The Secret Continued...

2008-06-24T12:12:00.000-07:00

Lunch is served. It's tostadas. Very interesting thing... before I decided that I was going to experiment with "Secreting" my lunch today... I was actually hoping for tostadas... then when I made the firm descision to utilize the powers of "The Secret"... i got greedy with the idea of pizza. Thus... "The Secret" does work with whatever you "Secret" FIRST...once you shift your thinking... the forces of "The Secret" dissapate into a dark abyss of secrets...I think.

The Secret...

2008-06-24T11:12:00.000-07:00

It is currently 11:12 am... I'm at work waiting for lunch to be served. I have been using "The Secret" all morning to be served pizza....I will let you know if it works as soon as lunch is served.
Let's see if this whole "Secret" thing works once and for all!

Deal vs. Scam...

2008-06-18T11:17:00.002-07:00

One of these is a deal...one of these is a scam... you decide...

Inappropriate...

2008-06-18T11:17:00.001-07:00

Have you ever realized that inappropriate places to smile such as...

Funerals...
Emergency Rooms...
The Gynecologist...
Jail...
The Proctologist...
The Principle's Office...
Life Rafts...
Holocost Muesum...
DMV...
Court...
The Morgue...

are also inappropriate places to roller skate...???

No Salad... Thank you...

2008-06-18T11:17:00.000-07:00

Don't have a salad at this house...

A Good Day...

2008-06-18T11:15:00.000-07:00

Just another beautiful day in 2008...

Rhyming With House...

2008-06-16T14:56:00.000-07:00

eightiesbangs (2:20:39 PM): What time are we meeting at
redfethrboa (2:23:55 PM): my house 8
eightiesbangs (2:24:23 PM): lie mouse bait
redfethrboa (2:24:44 PM): rye louse gate
eightiesbangs (2:25:12 PM): sty spouse plate
redfethrboa (2:25:57 PM): tie noose negate
eightiesbangs (2:29:10 PM): spy moose estate
redfethrboa (2:29:48 PM): eye caboose rebate
eightiesbangs (2:31:48 PM): pie mousse debate
redfethrboa (2:33:30 PM): shy use crate
eightiesbangs (2:34:25 PM): espy juice state
redfethrboa (2:37:31 PM): why loose fate
eightiesbangs (2:40:33 PM): cry zues wait
redfethrboa (2:41:16 PM): sigh ruse wait
eightiesbangs (2:42:12 PM): july excuse rate
redfethrboa (2:43:15 PM): supply truce delagate
eightiesbangs (2:44:21 PM): deny obtuse obliterate
redfethrboa (2:45:09 PM): ohhhhhhh that one gave me chills...
redfethrboa (2:45:38 PM): try noose concentarte
eightiesbangs (2:46:14 PM): ok, 2 things
eightiesbangs (2:46:24 PM): you've already used noose
eightiesbangs (2:46:28 PM): BUT
eightiesbangs (2:47:01 PM): they somehow we went from rhyming with house,
to rhyming with noose
redfethrboa (2:47:28 PM): whatever... you used moose twice
eightiesbangs (2:47:38 PM): NO
eightiesbangs (2:47:47 PM): I used moose, and I used Mousse
redfethrboa (2:48:06 PM): tricky
eightiesbangs (2:48:08 PM): Pure synanimaty

Frozen Burritos...

2008-06-16T13:05:00.001-07:00

Guess how many frozen burritos I'm going to have for lunch today??...2.

Do Yoga...

2008-06-13T14:23:00.000-07:00

If i hear one more person say... "you should do yoga"... I am going to scream. I KNOW I should do yoga. You don't have to tell me that. Everyone KNOWS they should do yoga. You don't have to tell anyone that. Please stop telling people like you have some underground secret information that yoga is good for you... WE KNOW...

Snail Mail...

2008-06-12T10:45:00.001-07:00

Nicolette's slightly genious idea of the day....
They should make stamps with snails on them... since you're "snail-mailing"!

Dirty Shoes...

2008-06-10T13:16:00.000-07:00

Look how dirty these shoes are!... Jeesh!...

Tomatoes... Until...

2008-06-10T11:33:00.000-07:00

Everyone's freaking out about tomatoes right now... cause of salmonella...ooooo scary salmonella.

This sign was hanging off of the drive through menu at taco bell yesterday.
First, allow me to show you the back of the sign...kind of the rough draft so to speak...

I love how you can almost hear their thought process... "until......"
I also love the handwriting.

This is the front of the sign...

Meat Loaf...

2008-05-28T15:17:00.000-07:00

Meat loaf... it's kinda like that guy you don't really like but keeps telling you you're pretty...

Bowling Ball Garden...

2008-05-27T19:44:00.000-07:00

I would like to thank the Universe for this Bowling Ball garden I stumbled upon...

Worst Short Film Ever...

2008-05-21T17:16:00.000-07:00

Matthew and I went to the 4100 and shot this horrible film on the fly. If you look very hard you can see Kieffer Sutherland in the background.
Enjoy the suprise ending...

Specials...

2008-05-16T08:47:00.000-07:00

hmmmm... I wonder if this place has any specials?...

Sunset Chardonnay Honerable Mention...

2008-05-14T15:04:00.000-07:00

After the "Sunset Chardonnay" I also woke up to this free association in my typewriter... it lacked spaces...

"softcouchinanevergreenforestofliteraturewithadeadbearatmyfeet
wishingrockandrolldatingworked.buthappythatitexsistswiththetower
ofjengatettoringinthebreezepleasechangethemusicvoteronpaul
pleasemakeoutwith20morepeoplebutdontbewithoutgumorlollipops
imtypingshitphrasesthatseemsomuchmorecoolsinceitisonthis
typewriter alwaysremembertobecoolistobedyinghappy_
thatsoundsstupid. handsandfingersaremyfavoritethings
evenwhenyoucantseethem.ifyouarecomfortablesmallmoviesarefun.
beingforcedagainstthewallduringanunwantedconversationisntfun
butgreattoreflectonlater.thepast
alwaysseemssimplerthanitreallywas.somakesurethatwhenpeople
rememberyoutheyremembertoomuchtosumup.
brighteyesmakesmefeeldeep asapuddleintheroad.
fuckthisnothingenoughofthis :)6_**-nate

Sunset Chardonnay...

2008-05-12T17:32:00.000-07:00

Had people over for a "Sunset Chardonnay" on Saturday. Thought this would be a nice grown up party... we would have an elegant glass of Chardonnay on the patio as the sun goes down...maybe talk tannins and current events... nibble on cheese... retire early...

Well.....after the guests left at 4am, I woke up to this pation table...

I don't know about you, but I don't even see any Chardonnay... but I do see binoculars, a wine glass rimmed in mayonaise, and at least 7 empty espressos.

Oh where the night took us.... Neil Diamond sing-a-longs... Jenga towers with String Cheese... rounds of "Row Row Row your Boat"... drawings of burn victims reuniting with their interracial family...dancing at the Akbar... and then there were the casulaties... such as a sprained ankle.

Good times everyone!

My Little Brother Continued...

2008-05-09T16:39:00.000-07:00

My little brother did this video for his spanish class with his green screen. Amazing... how he came up with the idea... and amazing that my Grandma is on the computer. Never thought I would see the day...

Designer Clowns...

2008-05-07T09:20:00.000-07:00

Next time you throw a birthday party or special event... consider getting a clown... but not your average everyday clown... call your local clown provider and ask for one of these designer clowns...

Allergic To Cats The Clown (shove a cat in his face and watch him get all itchy and puffy!)

Bloody Nose The Clown (great for a Halloween party!)

Firm Handshake The Clown (he'll greet your guests with a very firm handshake)

Uncomfortably Large Bulge in His Pants The Clown (adult parties only)

Looks Just Like Everyone Else The Clown (your guests will have a fun time trying to find out which person is the clown... "Hey Ma, is THAT the clown?" "No, honey, that's cousin Bobby!" Hilarious!)

Dead Pan The Clown (your guests will have a blast trying to get HIM to laugh!)

Spits When He Talks The Clown (great for a pool party!)

Chain Smoker The Clown (you provide the cigarettes and watch him smoke one right after another!)

Dresses For The Opposite Season The Clown (shorts in the winter, sweater in the summer... this guy is crazy!)

Fly Is Always Down The Clown (you just try telling him ... he'll act like he only speaks french! Joker!!)

Matchbox Experiment...

2008-05-04T19:10:00.000-07:00

Here it is.... by popular demand...my little matchbox experiment...

If i were to ask you how many different items you could fit inside of a matchbox and still be able to open and close it with ease.... how many would you say? 15? 22? 30???
Well, I posed the question one slow Saturday night....and I got 50!

50 Different Items in a Matchbox
1. a stamp
2. pinch of salt
3. a mirror from a disco ball
4. a Hershey’s Kiss flag
5. a toe nail clipping with green polish
6. the word “sex” from a ladies magazine
7. a dead bug (which died from natural causes)
8. 3 red crayon shavings
9. a golden bobby pin
10. a foil ball
11. a Fender guitar pick
12. a match ( just seemed appropriate)
13. a play dough ball
14. a nail (in which to hang a picture)
15. an entire yellow Post-It note with green writing
16. pinch of glitter
17. a penny from the year 1973
18. a bit of marijuana
19. a piece of a piece of pasta
20. a sliver of maple wood
21. a jigsaw puzzle piece
22. ¼ of a Mento
23. a piece of broken light bulb
24. 3 drops of a white taper candle
25. pink thread
26. pinch of cigarette tobacco
27. the word “waffles”
28. a dust bunny
29. an eyelash with waterproof mascara
30. 4 drops of Palmolive aromatherapy dish soap
31. a piece of a hem of a Disneyland t-shirt
32. a candle wick
33. the definition of the word “small”
34. an earring back
35. a contact lens
36. a used red twisty tie
37. a safety pin
38. the beak of a “Peep” candy
39. a blade of grass
40. a “small made in China” clothing tag
41. a fortune cookie fortune
42. a piece of 14 karat gold
43. a feather
44. a small silver chain
45. a crumb from toast
46. a sugar pill
47. a Valentines Candy heart reading “melt my heart”
48. a scrabble letter “T” (worth 1 point)
49. a leaf from a succulent plant
50. a shoelace aglet

Next Saturday when you find yourself without plans
give it a shot! You will be amazed ...matchboxes are deceptively large!

Dissapointing Popsicle Sticks...

2008-05-01T10:54:00.000-07:00

Dissapointing popsicle sticks... band name or fact?

I wanna go to the beach...

2008-04-29T15:10:00.000-07:00

redfethrboa (2:38:10 PM): whatcha doin?
eightiesbangs (2:38:27 PM): Shorking
eightiesbangs (2:38:32 PM): working
eightiesbangs (2:38:32 PM): ha
eightiesbangs (2:38:59 PM): I'm tired of sitting down all the time
eightiesbangs (2:39:04 PM): it make a me loco
redfethrboa (2:39:15 PM): yeah... i wanaa go to the baech...
eightiesbangs (2:39:39 PM): I want to be up and active throughout my day
eightiesbangs (2:39:48 PM): do important things
redfethrboa (2:39:53 PM): but you're too cerebral
eightiesbangs (2:40:41 PM): yeah, but I can utilize that aspect while doing shit
eightiesbangs (2:41:08 PM): and I'm quite intuitive, thank you very much
redfethrboa (2:41:56 PM): lets make mooooovies!!!
redfethrboa (2:42:00 PM): or start a Baaaaand
eightiesbangs (2:42:14 PM): pleeeeeeeeeeeeease!!!
eightiesbangs (2:42:45 PM): and exorcize more too
eightiesbangs (2:42:52 PM): aaaaahhhhh
eightiesbangs (2:43:03 PM): what have I done with my youth?
eightiesbangs (2:43:18 PM): NOTHING but drink and seek
eightiesbangs (2:44:12 PM): Hey, do you remember the 2 songs we wrote last Thursday?
eightiesbangs (2:44:26 PM): they were good, I swear they were
eightiesbangs (2:44:35 PM): but I can't remember them
redfethrboa (2:46:21 PM): i'm gonna have 5,000 cats... they're gonna be called cat cat cat... cat cat cat.. you can see where this is going it is cat times 5,000
eightiesbangs (2:46:42 PM): I LOVE IT
eightiesbangs (2:46:50 PM): OH MY GOD
redfethrboa (2:47:00 PM): the other one was based on a sentence that you said about your work and how they were down a bunch of money or something. can't totally remeber.
eightiesbangs (2:48:12 PM): We have to make that
redfethrboa (2:48:22 PM): ok
redfethrboa (2:48:39 PM): i wanna be like the movies
eightiesbangs (2:49:55 PM): What are you doing tonight
redfethrboa (2:50:09 PM): i haven't slept in three days.
eightiesbangs (2:50:17 PM): TAKE A XANAX
redfethrboa (2:50:22 PM): i was thinking about giving it another shot tonight.
redfethrboa (2:50:31 PM): whats up with the bold?
eightiesbangs (2:50:35 PM): It will help
redfethrboa (2:50:36 PM): relax.
redfethrboa (2:50:40 PM): stop yelling
eightiesbangs (2:50:42 PM): its for emphasis
redfethrboa (2:50:48 PM): i get it.
eightiesbangs (2:51:00 PM): wait, bold or caps
redfethrboa (2:51:16 PM): both, just stop yelling you're hurting my ears!
eightiesbangs (2:51:37 PM): I'm messing with the fonts and colors
eightiesbangs (2:51:57 PM): I had nasty orange, so I'm learning what to do
redfethrboa (2:52:14 PM): i don't see any orange
eightiesbangs (2:52:26 PM): what color is my bubble
eightiesbangs (2:52:49 PM): (I think it only effects others who use IChat
eightiesbangs (2:52:50 PM): )
redfethrboa (2:53:01 PM): what bubble?
eightiesbangs (2:53:47 PM): On my IM, it shows the persons icon, then puts a bubble next to them to show text. Like a comic book
redfethrboa (2:54:43 PM): mine is lame then... no comic book
eightiesbangs (2:55:03 PM): just words?
redfethrboa (2:55:20 PM): yes, RC... just words
redfethrboa (2:55:48 PM): wait. are you doing this from your phone or your computer?
eightiesbangs (2:56:37 PM): haha
eightiesbangs (2:56:46 PM): my computer
redfethrboa (2:57:11 PM): i want to be like a comic book. how do you get that?
eightiesbangs (2:58:24 PM): adium.com
eightiesbangs (2:58:44 PM): it wont give you IChat, but its better
eightiesbangs (2:58:54 PM): it will spruce it up
redfethrboa (2:59:12 PM): seriously get away from bold. your words are looking more imporatant than mine.
redfethrboa (2:59:18 PM): my words are jealous
eightiesbangs (3:01:58 PM): haha, I dont know how. Trying to find out

Tattoo Continued...

2008-04-29T10:29:00.000-07:00

So I still really want to get a tattoo...

but you know what they say about getting a tattoo...

"Whatever you do...don't get a tattoo until you know what you want to get tattooed on you"...

Text Messages...

2008-04-26T16:55:00.000-07:00

This is what a Text Message looks like...

This is what a Text Messgae USED to look like...

Grocery Shopping...

2008-04-24T10:43:00.000-07:00

Do you ever go grocery shopping... then when you get home you don't feel like putting it all away...so then you just eat everything instead? I did that on Tuesday...

R.C.'s Birthday...

2008-04-21T14:17:00.000-07:00

R.c's Birthday was one of the funnest nights I've had in a long time.... Havok was wreaked!!! We started at his house at 3pm and drank our share of champagne, jager, tequilla, beer, and of course... ESPRESSO!! Then we gathered our whistles and began our "Whistle Stop Tour".
The rules are simple...
1. we stop at every bar from Los Feliz to Silverlake
2. we only stay for ONE drink/shot
3. we blow our whistles loudly and often
4. we wreak havok on our way to the bars
5. we wreak havok in the bars
6. we do our best not to be arrested
7. we talk about how much we love R.C as often as possible

The videos below were taken with a small camera and i apologize for the poor lighting and quality. But enjoy...nonetheless...
These first two are walking down Sunset Blvd. after 5 or 6 bars...

This was at the end of the night... R.C. was D-runk!
This is kinda hard to see... at the Akbar dancing... if you squint you can see Mathew and Nathan

This was in the beginning of the day when we were still having somewhat normal convos...

Morning Show...

2008-04-17T19:15:00.000-07:00

It's about time I have my own morning show with my best friend, R.C...
We would call it "Mornings Come and Mornings Go! Nicolette and R.C.'s Morning Show!!"
A typical episode would go something like this...

You're wondering what's in the cups right?
Well, whiskey of course!

Free shoes...

2008-04-16T13:27:00.000-07:00

These "almost new" shoes are free for the taking. Men's size 9 1/2.
Please let me know if you are interested...

Jenga...

2008-04-01T15:23:00.000-07:00

I challenge you to build a Jenga tower of 36 stories. Rc and I built one of 35. Here is proof.... apparently in the directions you are only "pro" if you can go 36 or above.
I dare you... I really do...so difficult...

My little brother...

2008-03-27T17:38:00.000-07:00

My little brother will probably be President of the United States someday....even though I won't be able to vote for him ( he is republican)... in the mean time he creates amazing movies and music. My favorite movie of all time is True Romance.... my second favorite movie of all time is
"Frooga Looga Jegga Boppin" ... as seen below....

Happy Easter...

2008-03-23T13:53:00.000-07:00

For some extra fun this Easter... take a colored maltball (i like yellow) lick it an rub it over your lips...

Beautiful lipstick that is delicious too!

An Italian Joke...

2008-03-22T22:39:00.000-07:00

A little Italian boy enters the confessional.
"Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl."
The priest asks, "Is that you, little Joey Pagano?"
"Yes, Father, it is."
"And who was the girl you were with?"
"I can't tell you, Father, I don't want to ruin her reputation."
"Well, Joey, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later so you may as well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?"
"I cannot say."
"Was it Teresa Mazzarelli?"
"I'll never tell."
"Was it Nina Capelli?"
"I'm sorry, but I cannot name her."
"Was it Cathy Piriano?"
"My lips are sealed."
"Was it Rosa DiAngelo, then?"
"Please, Father, I cannot tell you."
The priest sighs in frustration. "You're very tight lipped, and I admire that. But you've sinned and have to atone. You cannot be an altar boy now for 4 months. Now you go and behave yourself."
Joey walks back to his pew, and his friend Franco slides over and whispers, "What'd you get?" "Four months vacation and five good leads!"

Good News...

2008-03-17T16:18:00.000-07:00

Good News!

I just got back from the dentist...and they are finally going to make me queen!!!!!!

I go back in 6 months for my crown...

Wink...

2008-03-15T10:06:00.000-07:00

I have a problem with winking...it's almost a tick...a habit... i wink when the bus boy takes away my dirty dish, when the man sells me a magazine, whenever someone helps me in anyway... it's kinda my way of saying "thank you".
Yesterday i found the worst possible place and time to wink at a stranger. I was going through security at LAX airport (you may see where this is going)...as i waited in a long line, i watched the security guy taking ids... he was serious...i mean this guy was thorough... he had a kind of light he would shine on the ids to see if they were fake and he was asking a lot of questions... i began to become nervous because i had lost my California drivers license (which happens all of the time... it's just a matter of wearing that outfit again) so i had brought my old Arizona drivers license which i got when i was 16 and doesn't expire until 2044!... nobody believes it because of the distant expiration and the faded picture that no longer resembles my mature features... i finally get up to the guy and he's not having it..."do you have a passport?" "not on me" "any other form of id?" "uhhhh....nope". He takes this big red stamp and slams it against my boarding pass and asks me to step aside. Finally a bunch of security start striping me down...patting me down and one man grabs my id and boarding pass and goes over to a computer. I ask one of the security "is everything ok?" she tells me i am a code 2 security risk... I say "oh, that's good?" Finally i get my clothes and purse back and the man walks up with my boarding pass and id... he hands it to me and says "please proceed to gate 80".... this is when i say thank you.........and wink at him.

Tatoo...

2008-03-12T15:31:00.000-07:00

My New Year's resolutions include the experience of getting a tatoo.... what to get is the question...
This is the tatoo i am thinking about getting.
Not quite so large though and not on my rear end.....

What I ate Today...

2008-03-04T15:45:00.000-08:00

Woke up at 9am and had a double espresso with a sugar stick, then I had a BLT around 10am... shortly following I had two potato tacos with salsa verde and spanish rice... then a chicken salad sandwhich. At about 3pm I was hungry... so I had potato salad with bacon crumbles, cheese ravioli with roasted atrichokes and bow tie pasta salad with red and yellow bell peppers and marinated yellow, green, and red tomatoes... I drank a coke and a vitamin water... for "lunch dessert" I consumed peach cobbler and a chocolate chip cookie...
When I get off work I look forward to preparing a pizza, having chips and salsa and some refreshing white wine...
Think I'll skip dessert...

Happy Birthday...

2008-03-04T10:02:00.000-08:00

I wrote a song that can be sung to friends and enemies alike. It's called "Happy Birthday". This is how it goes...

"Happy Birthday"

(sung to the tune of "Happy Birthday")

Happy Birthday...nobody likes you

Happy Birthday...nobody likes you.

start...

2008-02-28T16:04:00.000-08:00

Today I started a blog...